Reflections on charity during authentic economy class experience

Here I am in seat 65D flying over - I don't have Wikipedia right now - that body of water that separates Hong Kong and Japan. This means that I have 4 full hours to whine on this blog while digesting all those shrimp dumplings and bbq pork pastries I had at the airport. But I'm a bit distracted because I'm staring at an entertainment system that is as good as the one on United Business, and in some cases better. For example, each seat is equipped with an electrical outlet. Like, a real one. It's not even a ploy to get you to buy one of those Targus Duty-Free adaptors. There is also a selection of new English and Chinese movies on a screen just for you. The next time I fly, I will research my in-flight entertainment ahead of time. See, the majority of my DVD collection consists of movies that were purchased for flights that ended up showing them for free. The rest of the collection consists of, pretty much, Casablanca in the various geographical zone formats and an occassional uplifting installment of the Godfather trilogy.

I'm going from one Asian country to another. This means in-flight paperwork. I'm asked in Japanese whether I will be staying overnight in Japan. I respond in English "yes," and get handed a customs declarations card that's entirely in Chinese. Such is the casualty of being an American-born yellow person in Asia. I don't however, compared to being in Europe, get stopped in the street as often to be asked to take a picture for people.

The last thing I'm given is an envelope for Unicef. I think this is a fantastic idea. I get to unload all of the HK coins that I don't want to carry to Japan along with whatever else I feel like giving at the moment. Almost everyone around me is participating. Contrast this with the Save the Children assholes in front of my building in HK. Yes, there is a theory that law of large numbers works. And Russell Street, Causeway Bay is certainly on the short-list for busiest street in the first-world. But on this pedestrian-jammed sidewalk full of brands - Rolex, Longines, McDonald's - and this blog did start as a discussion of brand, I think Save the Children harms their own brand, at least in my view, by engaging in the following discourse:

"Sir, do you have a minute?"
"Sorry, I'm running late for a meeting. Best of luck today."
"It will be very quick."
"I actually give to you already."
"Are you sure? What's the name of the charity you give to?"
"You guys. Save the Children. For years."
Accusatorily, "That's not possible. We've only been in Hong Kong for barely a year,"
"In Canada."
[Look of skepticism.]
"You should work for immigration."

Auto-rebill in charities also annoys the hell out of me. I understand that steady cash-flow helps with planning. I get it. But I'd like to give what I want to give in the moment, and do not want to commit and have to go out of my way to call someone and get leading guilt questions before I can cancel. What is a leading guilt question? Example: Borders at the checkout during Christmas time: "Would you like to donate a book so that a child in poverty can have a chance to read?" The answer, after a what-the-fuck-brain-freeze, is, "yes, I have lots of books at home I would like to donate. No, I'm not going to buy a book from you to do it under these circumstances. Can I have my $10.99 Christmas edition of Decanter, now?"

The flight attendants come by with cans of Asahi on a tray. And what is this? A meal served on a 4-hour-flight? Service in Economy Class even starts from the back of the aircraft. This is great. I'm going to have beer, and then I'm going to figure out whether this plane has wi-fi, and if it does, I'm going to see if I can cancel my Save the Children account via American Express. I really hope this plane safely lands in Narita.