Leaving the Middle Kingdom

I had previously talked about how the number 8 is lucky for Chinese people because it phonetically sounds like the word for getting rich. Similarly, the number 4 is unlucky because it sounds like “death.” Moreover, “14” is even worse because it sounds like “must die.” In areas where there’s a high concentration of Chinese people – like casinos, and well, China – buildings have a 13^th floor but not a 14^th floor.

When my Business Class upgrade came through, I decided to go with the strategy that selecting a seat in Row 14 would minimize the probability of having an annoying middle-aged Chinese dude as a neighbor – the kind that takes every newspaper at boarding, and proceeds to turn the pages into your airspace, occasionally knocking over your beverage. The strategy failed. That’s exactly who I got.

I washed some NyQuil down with Crozes-Hermitage and tried unsuccessfully to fall asleep. Can’t wait to blow out the rest of my frequent flyer miles and never fly United again.